Is it wrong not to notify someone when you won't be purchasing a product or a service?
Two questions arose from readers this week that are variations of the question about how obligated we should feel when dealing with someone wanting to sell you a product or service.
The first is from a reader we're calling Dinah who has been shopping for a new dining room table and chairs. At one furniture store she visited, a salesperson spent a good deal of time with Dinah showing her tables and chairs, what finishes were available, and then quoting Dinah a price, which the salesperson printed out with details so Dinah could take the materials home and consider the purchase. After arriving home, Dinah called the salesperson to ask her for the dimensions of the table, which weren't on the printed materials. Throughout the salesperson was patient and responsive, according to Dinah.
A few days after her visit, Dinah decided that the dining room set was not exactly what she wanted so she wasn't going to go forward with the purchase. She wondered, however, if she owed it to the salesperson to call her to let her know and to thank her for her time.
The second question is from a reader we're calling Winnie. Winnie is in the market to buy replacement windows for her home. She made several calls with installers so they could come to her house, take measurements, and give her an estimate for the cost. Two of the three prospective installers showed up on time, took the information they needed for an estimate, and left. The third person was supposed to arrive between 11 and 11:30 a.m., but never showed up. By 6 p.m., Winnie had heard nothing from the third person – no sorry for missing the appointment, no attempt to reschedule, no nothing.
Winnie wondered if she should call the person who didn't show up to find out what went wrong.
In each case, there is no obligation for Dinah or Winnie to call the salesperson or vendor.
With the dining room set salesperson, Dinah had not committed to the sale and the salesperson was well aware that a sale isn't a sale until the deal is closed. If Dinah wanted to call the salesperson to thank her for her time and to let her know she wouldn't be making the purchase, that would be a nice gesture. A customer isn't obligated to tell someone when they don't plan to buy something. Doing something nice when there's no obligation to do so can be a good thing.
With the no-show window person, Winnie has absolutely no reason to call them. The window person should have called Winnie to let her know they wouldn't be keeping the appointment. If they should ever call or text, Winnie would be wise to consider that experience in weighing who to use to install her windows.
Providing good service and showing up when promised should not only be bare minimum requirements for product or service people, they are the right thing to do.
Jeffrey L. Seglin, author of The Simple Art of Business Etiquette: How to Rise to the Top by Playing Nice, is a senior lecturer in public policy and director of the communications program at Harvard's Kennedy School. He is also the administrator of www.jeffreyseglin.com, a blog focused on ethical issues.
Do you have ethical questions that you need to have answered? Send them to jeffreyseglin@gmail.com.
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