Are we too polarized to show kindness one sip (or slice) at a time?

Are we too polarized to consider doing something nice for someone in need if we don't know the person in need?

A couple of months ago I wrote about the head of police in Naples, Italy, who was accompanying the actor Stanley Tucci on his eating tour through the country in his show Searching for Italy on CNN. The police officer caught my attention when he ordered "due caffe e un caffe sospeso" which translates to "two coffees and a suspended coffee."

As I explained, the tradition of the suspended coffee, where a customer pays for one more coffee than is to be consumed reportedly began in Naples ages ago. It was a charitable act from those who could afford to pay now to be claimed later by someone who couldn't afford a cup. If you're thirsty, you just ask the coffee seller if there is any sospeso available. If it is, it's poured with no additional charge.

I wondered why caffe sospeso or anything else "sospeso" couldn't become a local tradition in our own neighborhoods whether we live in a big city or a small village. Readers from around the country responded.

"I'm afraid too many people would be horrified to realize that an undeserving wretch of the opposing political party might be the lucky recipient," wrote longtime reader Phil Clutts from North Carolina, only "partially in jest."

But Pat Maloney, a reader from California, thanked me for bringing the sospeso concept to folks and immediately took to the Apple App Store to look for a sospeso app that would enable him to start paying it anonymously forward. Unfortunately, neither of the two apps listed in the store were active. "Hopefully, someone reading your article will produce an app that actually works!" he wrote.

And finally, there's Kate and Alec Goodman, twin brother and sister who are 16-year-old 10th grade students in Port Washington, New York. The siblings wrote to tell me that in January they had launched their community service program "Port Pays It Forward" to promote a similar "ripple effect of kindness" as the caffe sospeso.

Kate and Alec arranged with Carlo's Pizza in Port Washington to allow people to pay an extra $3 for someone who might not be able to afford a slice. Their mother keeps track of Venmo donations made through their Facebook account and Carlo's co-owner, Daniel Cenatiempo, keeps track of the donations made directly at the restaurant which are posted as Post-it notes on Carlo's wall. Since launching, they tell me that more than 1,600 slices have been purchased through $5,000 in donations.

They have also worked with local agencies serving area residents in need to get donations of pizza pies delivered for lunch and dinner. They say they were touched after receiving personalized thank you cards and drawings from some of the recipients.

"The community has really come together," they wrote. "We plan on making Port Pays It Forward part of the community forever."

Even if Phil Clutts was only partially joking about the fear of committing an act of kindness to someone of an opposing political party, I'd like to prove him wrong. I'm pretty certain that pizza has no political affiliation nor does coffee. Nor, for that matter, does hunger. If you want to join Kate and Alec and many others who enjoy doing something for someone in need, then the right thing is to commit to kindness wherever you can.

Jeffrey L. Seglin, author of The Simple Art of Business Etiquette: How to Rise to the Top by Playing Nice, is a senior lecturer in public policy and director of the communications program at Harvard's Kennedy School. He is also the administrator of www.jeffreyseglin.com, a blog focused on ethical issues.

Do you have ethical questions that you need to have answered? Send them to jeffreyseglin@gmail.com. 

Follow him on Twitter @jseglin. 

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